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I Hate My Dog


Yeah.  I do.  You know, I’ve been trying to love her, but she doesn’t want to be loved.  When I first brought her home she woke me every 2 hours to pee.  Every 2 hours for over a week.  Then we graduated to every 3 hours.  She howled all night.  She barked all the time.  She slowly seemed to get better.  Except for peeing on the floor and not seeming to connect “outside” with “this is where your pee goes.”  She pees on people when the come to see me. Dribbles all over the floor. She has to jump all over you. Even when she sees you every day, you must be jumped on. She took a towel off the oven rack and ate it.  She chewed my laptop cord.  She chewed the kitchen table and chairs.  She digs in the yard.  She stole hummus off the table last week.  And lime pound cake a few days ago.  She steals tissues and dryer sheets out of the trash can and laundry baskets. She whacks you with her toys and insists on crunching the plastic bottles on your legs. She tore open two dog beds; one within 24 hours of my purchasing it. She chases Stash and barks at Stash. All the time. She never seems to understand NO and LEAVE IT. What the fuck is wrong with this dog that she doesn’t understand NO?

Tonight though, tonight she earned her walking papers.

This shawl


and this shawl


are destroyed.  The damage is so devastating,  I can’t bring myself to take pictures.

I knew that I should put them away Friday night. Why I ever took such lovely pieces to the rinky dink county fair, I don’t know. I put them on the chair in my room. Intending to put them away as soon as I finished knitting the sweater that would never end. I was careful to keep my door shut so Abbie couldn’t get to them. Apparently, she got in my room and ate them anyway. It can’t have taken long, she was barely out of my sight tonight. They were scattered on my floor and the door was open after we came in from the rabbit barn. Hours of work. Destroyed. I’ve just had it. I’ve had it. I can not live with this dog any more.

I miss Beau. I miss my wonderful dog who only ever destroyed 2 things, 2 inconsequential things. Who followed me around and was so quiet. Who played nicely with Stash in the yard and protected my baby bunnies when I brought them in the house. And who NEVER barked unless it was something REALLY important. Who was so happy and never jumped on people or peed on the floor when a new person walked in the door. I hate Abbie.

And, you know. One of the reasons I bought her was because I wanted someone to come home to after Avi moved to fucking Phoenix for work. I have cried so many times because of this dog. And don’t try to tell me that obedience classes will help. We’ve been through obedience once. And time. I don’t give a shit about time. Time won’t bring back my handspun shawl or my silk shawl. Time won’t stop the fucking barking. And it isn’t like she doesn’t have all the chew toys I can’t afford. I have no money to buy chew toys, but I charge it anyway. I’ve bought her at least 5 beef knuckles in the last 5 weeks. Plus two other beef bones. She has so many toys and things to chew. I can’t take it. I can’t take. I hate this fucking dog who won’t learn.


8 thoughts on “I Hate My Dog

  1. Consider using a shock collar. Sounds mean as hell, but after they learn “No” with a bit of a shock behind it, all you have to do is put the collar on them (uncharged and turned off even) to remind them to behave. One of our furry kids get a bit overly rambunchous sometimes, and we put the collar on her and she calms right down. I haven’t even charged the damn thing in a year.

    BUT, if you do try this method, and discover that she can tolerate a rather high voltage shock – be warned, she might not take to this kind of training. Some dogs just have a high threshold for the shocks, and that is something that is really hard to train around.

    Remember Abbie is a border collie, and they NEED jobs…something to do every day. You might want to consider getting a couple of sheep (or even geese) for her to herd. Most border collies have the herding instict bred into them so strongly, that they will herd with little or no training at all. Our dogs are retrievers and they have to do their little retrieving thing every day, or they get crazy antsy.

    P.S. I considered giving away one of my kids when he cut up a piece of hardanger embroidery I had left laying around. Fortunately, that feeling eventually passed….well mostly passed.

  2. So sorry about your beautiful shawls!

  3. Tango was the same, plus the knocking down of the boys on top of the destruction and hyperness – we couldn’t even get him to sit down next to us, ever! We called on the canine trainer Hector Hernandez (I know it is a commute or maybe he may know someone by you) – Tango is not the same dog, he is wonderful now. We tried obedience classes too and it just didnt work – we had to use a pinch collar and Hector’s methods. I was skeptical that anything could work but it did. Good luck

  4. I couldn’t be sorrier — or more empatheti

    c about the money side of it. Will keep you close to my heart, though. XOXO

  5. So sorry – I know it’s SOOOO frustrating! We were pretty lucky with Omar (which probably just makes you want to punch me), but there were a few moments of “WTF have we gotten ourselves into – I want Annie back!!!” along the way.

    You may just be looking for support and not advice, but I definitely agree with Kristi about a private trainer consultation. We’re lucky to have AMAZING trainers here at our humane society (like, women who used to train dolphins – why they left that to work at a shelter is beyond me) and I know they have done phone consultations in the past. Their main job is rehabilitating dogs that have been relinquished by their owners for behavioral problems, so they have a lot of experience in that area using positive reinforcement methods (although some negative reinforcement would probably feel really good to you right now!). I’m sure there are great trainers near you also, but it’s so hard to know if you’re getting the world’s best trainer or some crackpot unless you get a referral from someone. Maybe try a local agility club or border collie rescue/club for recommendations? I know border collies tend to have a LOT of behavioral problems if they’re not working (because they need so much mental/physical energy release), so those people might have had some of the same problems.

    I know money is tight – I’d be more than happy to contribute to an Abbie training fund if it might be the difference between you loving your dog or having to get rid of her!

  6. First and foremost – please accept this enormous (((((hug))))). It’s really horrible for you that Abbie destroyed your shawls.

    Is this really the final straw or do you think that your relationship with Abbie can be salvaged?

    You aren’t daft, I know that you knew that Abbie was never going to be a replacement Beau. She is a completely different dog with a completely different personality. I suspect that you just weren’t prepared for just how different she is and how pesky her beheaviour is in comparision with Beau’s?

    It is clear that carrying on as you are, isn’t an option – it’s not working out for either of you and could be more damaging to Abbie (and the things that you cherish at home) longer term.

    I support the points of view offered in your other comments. If you think that your relationship with Abbie can be salvaged, then she’s still young so extra time to mature, extra training and some good collie oriented tasks may improve her house training and behaviour.

    However, if her personality and behaviour are really getting in the way of you connecting and living together successfully and/or you do not have the resources (energy, time, money, emotion) to invest in more training, then I can see why you might want to consider finding her a new, safe home with owners who can give her the time and training that she needs.

    Neither of these are easy things to do. I know that you will give it a lot of thought before you decide.


  7. So…yeah. Just realized she’s not a border collie!